Posted 4:40 AM by w3y
Artists ver2.0: Jerks

okay, so i've already ranked on artists once, but they're just so easy to make fun of because they are so dumb. this time, my information doesn't come from pure observation but from an artist themself (roddd). since artists are dumb, he is unable to write this himself, so the responsibility to relate the information to the general public falls on my shoulders.

you may be thinking, "hey, i know some artists, they seem alright" and by no means am i saying that they're jerks to you. rather, they're jerky and mean to each other. lemme try and elucidate.

artists have these things called, peer reviews. in said review, they are to tell each other what they think of the artist's work. the thing is, since most artists are dumb they don't have much to say. this would be alright if they made up for it with execptional skill or talent. the majority, though, are stuck in their own mediocrity. what does this have to do with their peer reviews?

during these pure reviews, artists can either praise the work or trash it. instead of saying what they are really thinging and what the piece condigns, such as "it sucks" "wow, how'd you come up with such crap?" "i just want to dig my eyes out it's so horrible". you get people saying things like, "i like it" "that's really good" "i like the... yah". why do artists give ambiguous feedback? art is probably the most cutthroat profession out there, more so than engeniering or computer science.

let's see if we can figure out why artists due this. we have already established that most artists are mediocre at best, and that's being nice. we can even go so far as most artists stink. so rather giving constructive feedback to the person, they'll give hem those ambiguous phrases full of empty praise. all in an effort to stymie their talents. artists are dumb, they think that what they've done really is as good as people say.

"if they all do this, don't they know that people are just saying it?" is the counter argument. you forget that artists are dumb. they can't tell the difference between their left and right foot. to them, there is no such thing as left or right, it's just a matter of style. the few people that do realize this are the few people that do have talent. this is because they can tell that when people say their "comments", they know they are just being patronized. those that don't realize this never get better because they are constantly being told "it's good", which is enough to satisfy them.

this is why artists are jerks. they don't care about the other person at all. they know that it's easy being an artist, so the only way to get ahead is to keep them from improving. if on the other hand, they were constantly being told that their work "sucks", then one of two things would happen. they'd cry and run away and never come back. which does the world a favor by eliminating the possibility of having to look at their trash. or two, they cry and run home and have the motivation to prove you wrong. in which case, they will continue to be mediocre because they don't know how they suck.

if you're an artist, this may be the first time you realized that you were a jerk. maybe its the first time that you realized that other artists are jerks. what can you do about it? nothing. you will continue giving ambiguous praise so that they will be perpetually mediocre. if you havn't realized this before, you will now consciously do it, just compounding the problem. the issue is reinforced even more because now that you know other people are doing it to you. you will begin reciprocating the action.

i'm sorry if this wasn't as coherent as it could have been. i had written up a far superior blog, unfortunately, i forgot to save it (i was at arc labs) so now its gone forever.

It's good,
-WeY

Posted 3:18 AM by w3y
Dumb People

why is that people must find some silly notion to believe in. whether it be in aliens, conspiracy theories, or that they are secretly being laughed at. are people really that dumb? are we just not giving credit where credit is due? i say, they're actually dumber than we think.

you look at films like zoolander. stupid stupid movie. it was funny, but boy was it stupid. it took absolutely no brian power whatsoever to watch. and maybe that's why i watched it. maybe it's why i enjoyed it as much as i did. whatever the reason, this has absolutely nothing to do with what i'm talking about. oh yah, dumb people.

so there's this new movie comming out with mel gibson. the main plot vehicle is supposed to be these crop circles. where did they come from? how are they made so perfectly? was it aliens? only aliens would have the intelligence to do something like that. unfortunately folks, i love bursting your bubble, but those crop circles were made by a bunch of kids. i guess not many people know this. either that or many people just choose not to.

are we really that dumb that we can't explain a few rings of flattened grass? "but it's so perfect" they claim. no wonder we think we're so stupid. we treat ourselves as if we were. zoolander is just proof of that.

beyond crop circles, we have the belief in aliens as a whole. given, if you believe in evolution, this is "possible" in the strictest theoretical sense. just like it might be possible that my butt doesn't smell. as of now, they haven't been able to find a single planet where life can be sustained. sure there are those planets that "might" be able to support bacteria. that's not saying much. i won't get into the whole debate over the existance of aliens, at least not now.

why do we have this need? what does this do for us? if there were in fact aliens living in our universe, they would almost definately be hostile. why? because they made it all this way over here to this dinky little planet. it's like when we come across an anthill. at first, they seem interesting, but then they start getting kinda annoying. we start thinking to ourselves, what would happen if we put our foot here? oh, they go around. what would happen if i took out my magnifying glass? oh, they burn.

similarly, if aliens found us, they'd start moving mountains around just to see our reaction. we'd start throwing our rocks at them and they'll just laugh at our feeble attempts to retalliate. in response, they'll whip out their super giganto magnifying glass and fry entire cities. as you can see, the aliens would be hostile not because they'r mean, but because they'r jerks and because they can. you know you would do the same thing if you were in their position. what matter is to them if they found a dinky little planet and they destroyed it? nothing. lucky for us, there are no aliens, again, we won't get into that.

conspiracy theories. i'm a big fan of these for the sheer entertainment value of them. do you really think that the governement would be dumb enough to do something that they don't want us finding out about but somehow manage to leak it out into the world so it's become some of the most common topics of all media? i don't think so. i think if the military really wanted to keep something under wraps, they'd kill all that were involved and no one would know about it. as it is, these are just fairy tales. just like stories of cinderella or king arthur, but without the gruesome endings.

it's easy to believe in conspiracy theories, because they're large, complex, and put the blame on whoever you don't like. especially if its on the government. it's so easy to hate the government. just look at taxes and welfare and other things that steal our money. in the end, government is intended for the people. how do you think the senators and the representatives keep their houses? by keeping the people that vote for them happy. without you people, the'd be like everyone else, paying taxes.

and to those of you who think they are secretly being laughed at, it's just not true. it's not a secret. we're all laughing at you openly, you're just too dumb to realize it and think we're laughing with you. so all this time when you thought peopel were secretly laughing, you were just too dumb to notice.

oh, i'm laughing with you,
-WeY

Posted 12:11 AM by w3y
Gift of Love

i'd like to propose a radical idea to the Christian community, especially to those that have been in the faith for several years now. we all have a bible, possibly 3 or more. i know many of my fellow brothers and sisters will react harshly to my proposal, but hear me out.

we all probably have that one bible that we love to death. we take it wherever we go. we write in the margins our little thoughts and our little questions. we underline our favourite passages. we color code them and cross reference them. the pages are all tattered. the cover is practically falling off. there's coffee stains, soda stains, all kinds of wear on our word. we love our bibles. we pour our love into them.

what i propse, is that you give your bible to someone. not just anyone, but your best friend (who isn't a believer). show them how much you love them by giving the one thing that is irreplaceable. your bible. there is no other bible like it on the face of the planet. no one else has written the things you have written. no one else has underlined the passages you have underlined. no other bible in the universe has gone through the things your bible has gone through.

you're probably staring at me as if i were the spawn of satan now. "how could i give up my bible?!" you ask. i say, because you love. you have loved your bible, but you love this person more. you love them so much that you are willing to part with the one thing in your life that is irreplaceable. this isn't some stranger we're talking about. this is that one person in your life that means everything to you. the one that you love.

so show them love by giving them love. it's easy to just go to the store and buy a bible. but who can buy a bible that has your specific touch. your nuiances? nowhere. your bible is unique, just like you. and in a way, you are giving this person a part of yourself.

"you're crazy", that must be what you're saying. "you're out of your mind", i guarantee you that i am not. i know that's not much of a guarantee, but its the best i can do. now what would make someone like me say such a crazy thing? well, roddd im'd me and gave me this link: mail a bible to hungry souls. i took this idea and formulated what you have before you.

i know this will be a difficult task for you to accomplish, and many will not be able to do it. this is not something for everyone, but i encourage everyone to think of that one person they would like to see in heaven with them. worshipping the lord almighty by yourside. will this change their life? i don't know. will they be saved? i don't know. honestly, that's not the point. you don't do this because you want results. you do this because you love the person. you do this because you know they are worth it.

this isn't about what will happen. this is about showing love. do you love this person to the point where you are willing to part with the one thing that you care most about? do you love this person so much that you are willing to intrust not only God's Holy Word, but your love and heart to them?

if you would like to participate in this ministry, i encourage you to love your bible. continue doing what you do every sunday, every small group, every day in your devotions. and resist the temptation to give them your bible right away. instead, i urge you to read through the entire bible at least once. whether you make marks in the whole thing or not, it doens't matter. once you've read through the whole thing at least once, then you can give it to the person.

if you choose to make this commitment, i would like you to write on the first page of the new testament, right now, a message to the person you will be giving this bible to. sign it with love and date it. when you have finished or whenever you feel that the time is ready, give it to them.

now that you've given, or will soon be, away your bible, you can start again. get a new bible. love it. and once you've loved it through at least once. do the same thing again.

i realize that this ministry may take years and year, but that's alright. we have a soverign God, who knows how He chooses to use this? to let you guys know, i am doing this. i'm not going to say who, but one day, that special someone will get my bible.

With God's Blessing
-WeY

Posted 11:15 PM by w3y
Sex: The New Idol

i never really thought too much about this when i was younger. but as i matured in my faith and my beliefs and conservatism started getting molded, this became a shocking realization for me. sex is an idol. what do you think of when you think of idol? do you think of your car sitting there at a light? no, not that kind of idle. i'm talking about worship and devotion.

i remember when i was in high school, even into the first year of college, my friend burma wanted nothing more to get layed. we always laughed at him at how hard he tried. he was so obsessed with it and so set on it that it consumed him. freshman year, i met some of his friends that were of the same mindset. i didn't think too much of it then, other than that they should invest their interests in other activities. only recently have i truly realized what a grasp sex has infiltrated our society.

i rememeber watching american pie back in high school. everyone thought this was such a funny movie. but no one really talked about the main driving plot tool: sex. here, are 4 guys, they're main goal is to get layed before the end of high school. what kind of goal is this? what does it achieve? nothing. there's no satisfaction in it. there's no reward. there's no celebration.

this is the lie that satan has fed us. that its okay to be open about sex. that we shouldn't be ashamed of something that's natural. but sex is something beyond natural, beyond shame, beyone vulnerability. yes, satan is partly right about a few things, that sex is natural and beautiful. but it is not something to be thrown around as if it were a worn old coat. i'm not going to get into the sex is sacred business, rather, i'm going to address the impact this has had on society.

when i say society, it's only the post-modern, american, 20 something and younger society. a sub culture of people who say that this is what they worship. this is what they desire and long for. sure they say that they want this or want that. they want cars, a big house, money. the impetus behind this is so they can get with the opposite sex in one way or another. it's not even about marriage. marriage doesn't become and issue until they've become old and insecure.

this sex comes in two forms. implicit and explicit. in movies like american pie, the sex is an explicit goal. but in various television shows, they seek opposite gender relations, which implicitly implies sex. i'm not going to talk about dating here, but that is definately an issue that needs to be addressed. lets look at all the things that are used to try and please this idol that america worships.

first, we have alcohol. oh mighty liquid, deceives us and blinds our vision and our thoughts. a few drinks here, a few drinks there, and she's almost a guarantee in the bag. notice i said she. it's not challenge getting a man into the sack, we'd jump in with no looking back. the challenge is getting the woman distorted enough so that they can look past the fact that we're not eloquent, we're not well kempt, nor are we remotely attractive. this is achieved by the use of highly effective "beer goggles". once donned and dazed, the opposite gender is easy pickings for those that have no aprehension against taking advatage of the disadvataged.

this isn't to say it is completly men's fault. the woman is there at the bar/club for the same reason, to meet the opposite gender. if they didn't want it, why are they there? they know that the chances for such a thing to happen are a lot higher.

second, is material possessions. men have this crazy idea that the more they have or the better of something they own, the more likely it is to get with a woman. just look at the cars we drive. people try to get nicer and nicer cars. expensive cars. sexy cars. all for the hope of possibly attracting that one girl. is there any substantiated evidence that the women reciprocates the idea? no.

thirdly, we have status or fame. you look at all the "rock stars" and how they have women hanging off of them left and right. not to mention the actors and actresses. i'm sure some people like them for their acting skills, but the majority like them for their looks and the idea that they have in their head of possibly getting in the sack with them. this is espcially true when it comes to guys and female celebrities. have you ever tried to do a google search for a female celebrity's name? about 90% of the sites that pop up have some sort of nudity or tease of nudity.

look at "men's magazines". we are inticed by the covers with pretty girls. not just pretty girls, but pretty comma famous girls. the magazine as a whole is riddled with pictures of them scantily clad or suggestive positions. we're not even talking about the pornography industry yet. a few weeks ago when i went to dc, step-hen and i stopped into a small store. we looked at the magazine rack, 35% of the rack was composed of porno.

why is sex an idol? is it because it is forbidden? is it because it's special. maybe. but i don't think it's become truly worshipped until recently. it wasn't until a few years ago that "teen movies" starte popping up left and right. sure, some of these movies didn't imply sex directly (ie: she's all that). but there was still a large emphasis on the relationship that would probably lead to sex. then there's that horrible film, cruel intentions.

are these movies to blame? i don't think so. i am weary of blaming media as the root cause of social issues. that's not to say that media doesn't have an effect on social issues. i think that the problem was there to begin with. it was always ebing at everything in our lives. media just became overt with it, little by little. as media pushed the envelopes, it eventually brought it out into the open entirely.

as a result of this constent barrage of imagery, our sense of deceny has been slowly but surely, continually muted. how often to we hear cries about the content of sex in the media? the parents have long lost their voices. the news has long since quit calling it news. the liberals say this is the way it is. i'm not offering a solution. i just see the problem as it is.

Think about it,
-Wey

Posted 1:55 AM by w3y
Bags > People

something i've noticed more and more as i sit not only in class, but wherever i go, is the predominant preference for one's own bags over "charity" for others. for those of you that don't know what i'm talking about, just pay attention when you go out, you're on a bus, or you're sitting in class. you may be one of these people without really realizing it.

when i sit down, whether its on a bus, its in class, or i'm at hunan, i always place my book bag on the ground and let my jacket hang from my own seat. sometimes i kick my bag around too if i need more foot room. but do you notice that other people think that their bags are so important that they are required their own seats? they occupy an entire space just for a small bag. sometimes they use the space not only for their bag, but for their coats as well.

why do people do this? is it because they don't care about other people? maybe. granted, some people have some pretty nice bags or some pretty nice coats that they don't want to get dirty. but should that really matter in light of someone who is standing? maybe there's enough room for everyone and their bag, that's okay, i guess.

rather than saying that people just don't care about other people, i think people want space. we live in a country with such massive tracks of land. our houses are huge and our lawns are bigger. we drive around in trucks and suvs that are twice maybe even three times as large as normal cars. this goes beyond the lack of courtesy for people, this reaches into our most inner being and the way we have grown up.

this phenomenom can be viewed everywhere i go. in classes, the first thing people do is set down their bags in the seat next to them or in front of them. in my managerial economics class, this one kid takes up about 3 chairs. he puts his book bag and binder in the chair in front of him. he uses the chair to the left of him for his coat and he sits in his seat.

sometimes it is the lack of coutesy combined with the need for personal space that leads to our use of our own bags as spacers. on the bus, especially when its raining, i see many students sit in the aisle seat and put their bag by the window. this is especially bad because everyone is jam packed onto this one bus. sure it probably wouldn't make it anymore comfortable for anyone else if every seat was taken, it would just provide more standing room, but it does cut down on the capacity of the bus.

this need for personal space, and the desire for people to respect it doesn't end with just the placement of bookbags. i know a few people who get very uncomfortable when you get close to them. sharamon runs and tries to escape whenever someone is within her "3 foot" personal sphere. this is in my church too! where people are supposed to love each other and be one body. the bookbag love even persists within the pews during sunday service. sure we'll move them when we need to, but the majority of the time, we feel that our bags have a rightful place beside us.

this need for space is a fundamental desire to control and to conquer territory. you look at kings and dictators and rulers, almost every war in history has been over land in one way or another. only recently, have conflicts arisen because of another issue. it is this basic want and desire for more and more territory that drives us and changes our thought processes to say that "i have personal space". did the jews have personal space in the holocaust? no. you say that's an unfair example. look at the days of old. everyone was jumbled together in the same room, sometimes the same bed.

come to think of it, this may be another reason why we are so adverse to close quarters. our ancestors have been living in these cramped quarters for years upon years. now we have the ability and the privelege to have "space".

this territorial attitude goes beyong just our bookbags and ourselves, we use it to judge other people. we compare the size of each other's house. the amount of land that we own. the size of our rooms. the size of our cases. we use these size distinctions to say that we're better than others. oh, look at your house, it doesn't compare to mine. i think this is especially true when we think of ghettos or projects. all these people crammed into this small space. i'm glad i'm not living there we all think to ourselves.

when you first walk into a house or a building, what do you do first? i know the first thing i do is look around. even if they're not the first words that i utter, the first thoughts that float through my mind, is the size of wherever i am. as we stay in a place longer and longer, we start comparing it to other places. your room is a little bigger than mine. mine room is so much bigger than yours. oh wow, you have so much land. hmmm, your kitchen is kind of small.

so what does this all mean? it could either mean a lot or not much at all.

With God's Love,
-WeY

Posted 12:42 AM by w3y
Youth Specialties

youth specialties - a resource conference for youth workers.

i went to this thing this past saturday (04.27.2002). it was a pretty good experience. i had been working with the youth for the past year or so. well, i wasn't really working, more like just being there. but just being there among other youth workers were just so encouraging. even though roddd and i were the youngest ones there, we could really relate to the other youth workers and empathize with their struggles and trials.

after some reflection, i sometimes feel that the the yg isn't in such a bad position. and i felt really blessed that we have this group of kids. we didn't have a large drug issue, nor did we have a high abuse ratio. this was really relieving. i guess just looking back, we have a lot of high class issues. we struggle with image and materialism and sex probably a lot more than the baser temptations.

at the same time, i look at the yg and see so much trouble. sometimes i almost see the face of satan mocking us and our efforts. i look at our leaders and see how they live hypocritical and undisciplined lives. i mean, do you guys even care about the youth? or are you just there to please your own desires, your own pride, your own lust for power. i can't say any of these things for sure, but i know that they're heart is not there. it's evident when you look at the effort the put into things. not that i have a right to say anything, but it just seems that whenever something needs to be done, they manage to find something else to do.

this is the bane of youth working. long hard committments with very little fruit. especially since they're so young, it's difficult to read whether the fruit is real or not. the real testing will come in college. at one point, i used to be scared of this, and now that i think about it, it's necessary. that's not to say that we shouldn't try our best now, but college is just such a different environment, everyone changes.

this is why youth work is probably the most important and the most crucial in any christian's life. it sets the tone and the prescedence for when they leave and go off to college. once in school and away from their parents, it's up to them to go to fellowship and to go to church. this is not always an easy thing, especially if you start hanging out with the wrong crowd right off the bat.

its not that we need to fill their heads with knowledge, nor is it about making sure that they're saved. sure, these things are important in different ways, but the most important thing is to build and establish those long lasting relationships. even if it's so that you just say hi every once in awhile.

although it was great seeing all these other youth workers, it felt as if we were so far from the mark. we were doing things, but we weren't doing anything right. i'd like to blame this on the youth leaders, but i can't totally. a lot of the blame falls on me and the way that i am and the way that i live. even still, most of it can be blamed on the leaders for their lack of prayer, their lack of committment, and their lack of leadership.

my only hope is that God is driving His yg into the ground so He can rebuild it again. it certainly feels like that at times. but there's always that tinge of hope on the edge of your mind. as you look at the dismal pit that is in front of you, you can't but help but try to look away. in your peripheral vision, you see that little light that urges you on. whether the depredation of the yg is complete or not, i can't say. but i know that i want to be around when its climbing out of its own wretchedness.

i'm in that position that says, i can't stand you guys, let me get away. and the other side of me that says that i want to do more. i want to give more to you guys, i just don't know how. no matter how hard i try to pull away, i feel that i am forever pulled back into its grasp. almost like an abusive relationship, but not quite.

so for now, i will persevere and stick with it. whether i come back next year is still uncertain. but i know now how much i really do care for these kids. for the longest time, it felt as if i didn't care at all. that i was just donig it for the sake of doing it or if i was just going through the motions. but after this saturday, i'm not so sure anymore. do i really care? i pray so.

i'm sorry for the lack of focus in this post. i didn't really have a purpose in righting this, other than just to get my thoughts down. even now, it seems like there's all these conflicting ideas floating through my head.

For Your People Lord,
-WeY

Posted 3:16 PM by w3y
New Toy - it's women's fault

a few weeks ago, my buddy bachy showed me this link to what would be my new toy. i had been in the market for an mp3/cd player for awhile, but the majority of those on the market lacked all the features that i looked for in such a device. such as: a long battery life (23 hrs), a remote, slim, supported folder structure and m3u files, came standard with rechargeable batteries (NiMH). all of these features were found in the iRiver slimX 350. it was a bit pricey (175$), but the sex factor was so high on this thing i had to have one.

i placed the order on monday, actually, sunday night, and just got it today. so far, i just tested it a little bit, but it's surpassed a lot of my expectations. based on the website, it looked kinda fat, but it is very thin.

i don't want this post to all be able this new toy, but rather our need for new toys. you can find data on this thing anywhere, so i'll leave that out. why is it that guys must have the best, fastest, sexy toy there is? you look at cars, they have to be fast and powerful. computers, fast and powerful. cellphones, small and powerful. what is it about these items or anything else that drives men crazy?

we can try and say it's pride, but that's too simple. so i'll try to make up another excuse for the male population. i believe that men require the best, because they don't have a woman by their side nagging them and yelling at them to stop.

that's right, i blame it on women. it's all their fault that we're consumed by our competition and our desire to be better than other people, to have better things than other people. think about it. if there was a woman by me when i decided to buy my new toy, she'd yell at me about how much it cost. how it was pointless because i already had two just like it. who cares what that guy has? what about me? what do i get out of this. after about an hour or so, my ears would start bleeding. she'd be crying, and i'd be on my knees trying to aplogize for the way i treated her mother. and the next thing i know, i'm on the couch, and it's my house!

this, of course, is just a pitiful attempt to shift all the blame upon the opposite sex. is it right that i'm doing this? probably not. but that doesn't mean i'm going to stop. i'm just going to keep plowing through and see if i can put more blame on them.

[warning, broad generalization approaching; danger danger]

its your fault there's a hole in the ozone layer. if it wasn't for all the women of the 60s and 70s and their hairspray cans, we'd wouldn't be running from this menace (/me dodges a hairspray can). we wouldn't have to worry about the melting ice caps or skin cancer.

it's their fault that we have to grunt. why do men grunt? because we're constantly holding in our guts to try and impress them or to attract them. whenever they turn around, leave the room, or some how manage to not look at our fat mid sections, we let out all the air that we've been holding in with a short sigh. the moment their gaze is brought back, we grunt as we suck in the air again.

women are also responsible for the high rate of vehicular accidents. if they're not getting in accidents themselves, they're causing them. when women drive slowly on the highway, it forces us men (and our need for speed) to swerve and pass them at an even higher speed. if the women manages to somehow get the meter past 50, we're trying to avoid them and their reckless fading in and out of lanes. if they manage to get off the highway, they cause us more trouble by sitting at intersections, waiting for every car to go by till it's "safe". of course by the time this happens, the light turns red again so no one else can go through the intersection. if they manage to make the turn, they do it so quickly and carelessly that oncoming traffic and crosscoming traffic have to slam on their breaks or swerve to the side to avoid them.

even if they'r not directly responsible for vehicular manslaughter, they are to blame for the foolish things that guys do in their chariots of steal to "impress" them. when ever we're at home, minding our own business, we are suddenly and rudely reminded that we have to take the "hag" out. of course by the time we realize this its in the middle of the (insert favorite manly game here) game is just getting good. we say to ourselves, i'll just be a little late, it won't be that bad. and when (insert favourite team here) finally scores that critical game winning point(s), we glance at our watches and freak. because it's a lot later than we thought it was. "no problem" we think to ourselves. we'll just jump in our batmobiles and we'll be there in no time. this, of course, forces us to slam on the gas at every yellow; then slam on the break at every red, and generally drive like women. as a result of this recklessness, we are even later because we get a ticket for our incompetence and failure of leaving earlier. so when we finally do arrive, we have ticket in hand and make up some excuse that we got stuck in traffic, and then we had to do something stupid to make it there on time. we get a simpathy frown with the furrowed brow, and a gentle pity hug. mission success.

that's not the only reason we go fast. for some reason, men think that if they go faster than each other, it'll some how impress the girl that they like (not that the girl has any idea that this is going on, nor would she give him the time of day if she did). as a result of this racing, we get into accidents, tickets, or just get our pride destroyed.

besides these implicit responsibilites, women have a direct impact on our failure to drive. when men are on the road, even if they're on the high way, we have the wild idea that we might have a chance, just a chance, to see a hot girl. she doesn't even have to be hot, she could be cute. as a result of this mentality (and women's propogation of this problem) we look are constantly looking around. to the left. to the right. behind, anywhere but stright in front of us. we slow down and speed up to see if that girl is really as good looking as the back of her head would suggest. of course, it's not, and in our anger at our own stupidity and in an attempt to flee from that "ugly girl" we speed up and race down the street.

this is a specific problem when we're on the highway. not only do we look around at the trees (maybe there's a girl in the tree), we look around in the cars. not realizing that most of the people that we stair at are either old women or men. by the time we realize this and look past the glare and our own ignorance, we've given them that look. now they're pissed and try to run us down.

as you can see, the evidence against women is staggering. i mean, this is all just a sham. i made this all up. none of it is true. we're at fault. it's all men's fault that we're pigs and slobs and fat. it's our fault that the flowers don't bloom. it's our fault that rocks fall from the sky.

women are good drivers... really!

Don't kill me,
-WeY

Posted 3:12 AM by w3y
April Showers

it's been raining almost all week now. today was no exception. i woke up and it was all dreary outside. i saw the puddles of water and the people running to and from the busses all hunched over. i was considering just lying in bed, as i often do on mornings such as this: it was cold, i was still a bit woozy from the mike's last night, but i decided that there was a whole day ahead of me.

this was of course after aming called me to wake me up. i talked a little bit, and then i decided i would stay up. i shook of the tiny bit of wooziness that was left and proceeded to do my devotions. afterwards, i throgh on my jacket and ran outside. unfortunately for me, i don't have my shoes. i took them home last weekend thinking that it would be nice and hot; god really surprised me by hitting us with a cold draft.

so here i was, standing out in the rain. no shoes, no socks, just my cold wet toes. i rode the bus to college ave; taking in the smell of wet hair and dirt. one of those distinct "rain" smells that are amazingly pungent during these times. it was propitious that many of these smells left with their owners at the first stop, and i was left with just the smell of rubber and dank.

i got off the bus, half trudged and half trotted into brower. my toes were freezing cold by now--my body just as cold. i could feel the cold water dripping down my stalactite bangs into my eyes. now i had the pleasure of having another fine meal at brower. i had to go to the bathroom after i ate.

lunch was very uneventful as they usually are. i spent most of the time staring at the food--trying to cathch it move while i wasn't looking. it hadn't. it just lay there like the dead animal it was. on my plate. dead. wonderful i thought to myself. it's cold, its wet, and there's nothing to eat. at least nothing worth eating. i knew it was time to leave when my intestinal track told me to have clemency on it and let it relieve itself. i obeyed, quickly.

i wsa reminded of the cold and wetness that hung outside. my feet were angry at me for stepping through, what they probably thought, was every puddle along the way. as i attempted to step over one of the puddles, i thought to myself: april showers bring may flowers. i smiled at myself. partly because of my own idiocy. partly because i stepped in another puddle. i hadn't.

as i looked up to see the people walking by me, possibly on their way to the bus, possibly to the gourmet which was brower, possibly to hide under their covers; i remembered that caedmon's call song: april showers. "rain rain don't go away, oh we need you, this dry and dusty day" or some fax simily of that. i just thought about how it so contrasted with the childish ryhm: "rain rain go away, come again another day". i thought to myself: how narrowminded we were as children. we only saw the things that were immediate--the things that were right in front of us. we didn't care about droughts or plants or animals. we just knew that this rain was cutting into our play time. and then i thought about the caedmon's call song, and how it looked at our need.

of course, i didn't really think about this at the time. i was staring at my feet, trying to aplogize to them for the horrible treatment they were receiving. i wasn't doing this either. i was really deciding whether i should try and get fully under aming's small umbrella or to not bother. apparantly, this decision occupied my entire thought process. my feet continued to yell and scream as i continued to try and ignore them and hope that they'd go away. they didn't. by the time we got to murray hall, i was still contemplating what i should do in terms of the umbrella. of course we were at our destination, so the issue became null.

i actually just thought about all this just now. not now, but about 30 minutes ago as i was lying in bed attempting to fall asleep. funny phrase that is: fall asleep. we don't actualy fall. we just sleep. after about 30 minutes of lying there and being tempted and not falling nor sleeping, i got up and wrote this.

as young children, we failed to see the larger picture--the importance of this "rain". if i may be so bold as to propose an allegory, this rain is times of trial or suffering. just ask my feet, they'll support that claim. so this rain is a period of down turn in our lives.

as children, or as non-believers, or as naive people, we can just see the immediate impact of the situation. we curse the rain, asking: why why? i could've done this, i could've done that (insert outdoor activity hear). but no, it had to rain. stupid rain. but as we grow up, as we become belivers, as we become wise, we see the need of these situations. these times of downturn are the times that poor water on our spiritual lives. we don't appreciate because all we want is sun sun sun. or more n2 n2 n2. only afterwards, when the sun does come out, do we actually realize the necessity of that rain.

it was around 6:30. it was a repeat episode of simpsons. i had decided to skip my 336 class in favor of watching the detroit vancouver game. there was about 30 minutes to kill, so i decided to step outside and get some takeout from tillet. i decided that i would get a meatball with povalone. i attmpted to get this sandwich on friday, but in my own incompatancy, i failed to roll the sandwich up right and it all fell out into the plastic bag. not this time! this time, i would have my meatball sub.

i make my way over to tillet. not even close to thinking about anything above or the relationship between rain and sun, trial and growth. all i was thinking about was: it's bright and beautiful, but it's still cold. my feet said: we're not talking to you, we're still angry from before. i din't mind, i would finally get my meatball sub. no, i would do better. i would get 2! ha! make up for the one that was lost on monday.

as i entered tillet, i was greeted with a breif breath of warm air, then it became cold again once i was inside. i made my way down the hall way, briefly pausing in front of the lpo's; slightly tempted to check mine to see if my iriver came in. i knew it hadn't but maybe it had. no, must get sandwiches. unpropitisously, the line was a little longer than i had expected. was i willing to wait? was i willing to possibly miss the beginning of the wings' game? i didn't even pause to entertain such questions. i was already outside and huffing my way back into the warmth of my room.

the epiphany of the day didn't truly hit me until accountability group. we were sitting around and i was asked to open us in a word or prayer. to my wonderful and pleasant surprise, i pieced this day's events together: april showers bring may flowers. it's so simple. these times of trial, these ugly harsh times, are the means in which to grow beautiful flowers. just like our lives. the events that happens, we always complain about our current situation and fail to look forward to the beautiful flowers that will sprout because of them. we don't know what kind of flowers, but we can have hope.

all the stuff that happened during the day: my cold feet, the bad food, no meatball subs; that's all rain. the clouds will break, and the sun will come out, and Jesus will shine His glory upon us once more. the things of this world are so temporary and transient, how could we be so caught up in them? that's why we look towards may. we look to the hope that there will be flowers. we look to the hope that the sun will be more beautiful because all the dirt, all the icky stuff that's in the air has been washed away by this judgemnet known as rain.

Thank You Jesus,
-WeY

Posted 3:54 PM by w3y
Artists: Refuse of society

i'm sorry, but artists are the biggest cop out in the world. they're lazy, dumb, and useless. why do people become artists? because they can't do anything else. all the art majors i know, they chose to do it because they know they can't do anything else. they have no other options, so they choose to do art.

first i'd like to state that artists are not bad people. some of them are lazy, some of them are dumb, and some of them are useless. that doesn't make them bad. this is also not to say that all artists are lazy, dumb, or useless. just the vast majority of them. many of my closest friends are artists. i tell them they're dumb and useless all the time.

i like going to the metropolitan because it contains some real art. not this drivel that you see all over the place. let's look at what art is:

art - High quality of conception or execution, as found in works of beauty; aesthetic value.

this is what i think true art is. most people view art as just a form of expression, mainly of an idea or emotion. i say to these people: rubbish! classic art is about skill and quality. what i see around is people just slapping stuff together, making up some bs and calling it art.

this is why artists are the refuse of society: because they peddle their bs and try to get people to buy it. it's come down to the point where they sell just the idea with no actual product or work behind it.

what does this add to society? oh, we have some pretty pictures, some nice sounds, some elegant movements. not anymore. we have dung thrown on a canvas, that's not pretty. we have random noises emenating from our speakers, that's not nice. we have people just throwing themselves around, that's not elegant. this is all known as expression. they'r expressing an idea. what idea? i see poop on a canvas. what's the point?

this wouldn't be so bad if artists had a job! how do they subsidize themselves? they look for grants. okay, that's fine. as long as its from companies or corporations, not out of my back pocket. this thing called the national endowment for the arts pays for a lot of crap that i never get to see. why should i pay for things that i will never experience? oh, so others can. then why don't you charge a door fee, get them to pay for it. they already do. that's right. not only do i have to pay for it to sponsor it, i have to pay at the door. so i'm paying doubly much to look at "art" that i didn't approve of in the first place and that i don't want to look at now. so don't look at it. i paid for it!

if expression isn't art, what is. elegant code. intricate knitting or weaving. specific and detailed paintings. things of skill that people do because they love it. if it expresses something too, great. but the center of it should be the skill and precision and talent that it takes to produce such works.

mean time, many of these sole called artists don't have a job. they give nothing back to the society that produced them. they also just sit around and make art that complains about this, how society isn't fair. life's not fair. it's short, and then you die. tough, get over it. get a job.

you may say this is comming from someone who isn't an artist, you wouldn't understand. i do make "art". it's not always good, and i do it for myself. i don't seek to make money off of this, i do it because i enjoy it. this, i have nothing wrong with. if you want to express yourself in these ways, fine. but don't expect to live off it. i know i suck. i know that no one wants to read the poetry that i write. the storeis that i tell. see the paintings that i make. listen to the songs i compose. watch the dances i compile. yes, i do all these things. not to make money. not to complain about how it's unfair. not to make a commentary. i do it because i want to and i enjoy doing it.

meanwhile, stop being useless.
-WeY

Posted 3:30 PM by w3y
Failure of Afirmative Action

i know this subject has been talked about before, and i'm sure it's been talked about to death. i'm also probably not the most suitable or most qualified to speak on such matters. it is of some relevance not only to me but to many others out there.

i'd first like to state a disclaimer: these are just my opinions and by no means do i write this for the purposes of offense or attack. i am mearly stating my thoughts and ideas based on my limitted observations of the world and the things around me. if you are offended by this, tough. go write something that argues the other point.

as the title suggests, this is about affirmative action. in the name of equality and fairness, we extend a hand to those that are less fortunate or underprivelaged. i'm all for helping the littel guy, but not at my expense and a cost to others. this wouldn't be such a big deal if affirmative action were fair, that's just not the case.

we live in a capitalist society, one where hard work and persevearance win the day. with the onset of an egalitarian society and equality of all, we have forfitted excellence for mediocrity. if you had a heart condition which required immediate surgery, would you rather have the best doctor there was? or a so so doctor that was chosen based on his skin color. of course you want the best doctor, regardless of their skin color. they could be purple and that wouldn't make a difference, as long as they would cure me and keep me from dying.

so why is the attitude in acadamia and the corporate world so different? we have quotas that need to be met every season so the PR people can say that we are a "diverse" institution or organization. instead of being an excellent organization, we are mediocre and diverse.

i would like to think that i am in this school based on my merits or failings. i did well in high school, not excellent. i was thirteenth in my class, in the top 15%. but by no means was i excellent. now if i got into this school based on my skin color, what does that say of me? that the tone of my skin is more important than what i had actually achieved? i would be disgusted to know that.

this is the failure of affirmative action. we take kids from high school and instead of looking at their grades, activities, works; we look at their skin color. oh, he's black, we don't have enough of those, so he's in. oh, she's hispanic, we don't have enough of those, she's in. he's asian, we have too many, he can't come here. sadly, this is the way "higher" education functions. instead of looking at whether we should be accepted into the school or not based on what we can do and our abilities, we are cut down based on the pigmentation of out skin.

people ask, why is there still racism? this is why. because the problem is perpetuated in an attempt to achieve equality. if people want to be treated fairly, then they shouldn't get special treatment based upon specific attributes. at the same time, they shouldn't be limitted by those specific attributes either. people say, the system has to adjust for people's failings. i say, what if the skin tone wasn't even a matter of consideration? would they still be where they are today?

why must i forfeit my chances and opportunities because i am better than someone else. if i am better at a task, shouldn't i be hired because of it?

equality - The state or quality of being equal.

equal - Having the same quantity, measure, or value as another.

yes, i believe that we were all created with the same value: worthless and of a sinner. but i don't agree that we were all created with the same measure or quality. let me clarify. we all have the same value, when god sees us, no one is better than anyone else. but in terms of our skills and abilities, we are not equal at all. you look at the olympics for example. some people run faster than others. if i were to try and run against them, i'd fail, miserably. i'm not even in the same league as they are. in this way, we are not equal at all.

this difference in equality can be translated into the way we treat each other. in terms of value, since no one is worth more than anyone else, we should treat them that way. with the same level of curtesy and trust that everyone deserves. at the same time, we can treat them just as poorly as everyone else. no one should get special treatment.

when it comes to selection based on skill, it should be based on their merits and the skills that have been given to them. would i be chosen by the US to represent them in the 500m dash? of course not, i can't run for my life. i would tell them to pick the best man for the job, the fastest man. am i being unfair? no, one is clearly better than the other. it would be unfair if they were chosen solely because they were purple.

this is why affirmative action is a failure. instead of encouraging people to study harder, work harder; we tell them, it's okay to be mediocre. it's okay if you're lazy. as a result, the rest of society suffers. that guy who's having heart surgery could die because he's not getting the best treatment possible.

this is also unfair because certain groups of people are being treated differntly. that is the essence of unfairness: special treatment, whether it be beneficial or detrimental.

i know that there are plenty of hard working people out there. i hope you got where you are based on your own merits. if you truly desire equality, then you should seek being treated as such. don't seek beneficial treatment, don't look for easy ways through. try like everyone else.

people do judge, and i'm sorry that the world is like that. is there a way that we can stop people from judging? i don't know. i do know giving people special assitance because of it does not help, it only solidifies the opponents, the racists and the biggots. it just gives them more ammunition and more things to be angry about.

-WeY

Posted 2:01 AM by w3y
Tonight at CCF...

brian hall, oh, its DR hall now, gave probably his last talk at ccf. it was a surprising talk, one that should have been told many months ago, but the conditions for it probably weren't the best. come to think of it, there really aren't any good times to talk about this stuff.

the topic was about sin, maybe not sin it self, but issues related to it. the idea of being holy: set apart. i know this is something that we should strive for, and all the points that he made about righteousness were very good and should have been said, but it reminded me of this one verse:

1 Corinthians 9

19 Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. 20 To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. 21 To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law.

i know that this doesn't contradict or oppose brian's point about the need for rightesousness, but it does bring up the point of the idea of being "set apart". he's right that holy means to be set apart, but i think it has a different connotation. i think the emphasis needs to be made that we are to be in the world but not of the world.

this because extremely difficult because the world is such a distraction to us. we're influenced by the images we see, the sounds we hear, and the thoughts that we speak. it's a dangerous thing to be in the world, but at the same time, i think we are called to be in it.

i guess we can look at why. we can take Jesus as an example. he was in the world, no doubt about it. he was in the dirtiest darkest most disgusting places of this world. at the same time, he was not of the world. since he was perfect, this wasn't difficult for him. for us, it is extremely difficult.

i now look back to the verse that i referenced above. in order to bring the gospel into places where they might not otherwise be accepted, we must become like the people we are witnessing to. this is not to say that we do the same things that we do. we need to think like they do, talk like they do, and react like they do. this is the only way we can relate to them and gain the right to be heard. this is not to say that it becomes an excuse to indulge our sinful nature, by no means. it just makes it that much harder. like if you want to witness to drug dealers or drug abusers, you have to become a part of their world. you have to understand why they do drugs, what kind of issues they struggle with, what kind of feelings they have. if you don't understand their world, then you don't have the right to be heard by them.

now we come back to what brian was talking about. to say that we are completly set apart so that we have no contact with the rest of the world would be inaccurate. and he went over this. it's called isolation. at the same time we can't dive head first into the world, also known as saturation. the key is to have your foot in both worlds. you have to have a group of brothers or sisters that you can always come back to. you have to have your firm foundation in Jesus and the word. and only then can you be somewhat protected from the world.

what this has to do with righteousness, i don't know. but this is my next point.

---

Righteousness

this is something that we can never achieve on our own. in fact, we can never acheive it while we are still connected to our flesh. this isn't an excuse to just shrug it off and to do nothing. we need to seek righteousness, but we can't force it. let me try to explain.

if we try to achieve righteousness on our own merits, we will fail and we gain nothing. but if we seek Jesus and ask Him to manifest His righteousness in us, its a start. it's not enought to just say it or to just pray it. you have to actually go ahead and do it. this is probably the most difficult thing a person can do.

one of the slides that brian had up tonight, a person said that christianity is easy. i couldn't help but laugh at that thought. christianity is by no means easy. it is probably the hardest endevor that could possibly be taken by a human being. our goal is righteousness through repentence. repentence is just the beginning, the first step to what we wish we could be. over the years and years, we slowly manifest righteousness in our lives. unfortunately, we continue to slip and fall back into our sins.

this brings us to the issues that brian talked about tonight. a lot of them are issues that we know about but are unwilling to change. for instance: mp3's, divx, warez. all of which we are culprits of. it's especially easy when we're at school. we have highspeed connection and everyone has it. of course this isn't a proper justification, there is never a proper justification for sin. but this is what makes the sin so hard to repent of. we don't see it as a sin against god, instead, we see it as a victimless crime. again, no proper justification. until the spirit moves in us, we will never be able to give up that sin.

i've thought about this many times. i've come close many times. i still haven't done it yet. i try to rationalize it and make excuses, but that's all they are, excuses.

---

Fund Raising

i saw an intersting dichotomy today. two people were raising money for the march of dimes. while another person was raising money for a dj for some dinner. now i ask you, what is the point of this dj? i remember the days of high school when we had djs. all they ever did was play "popular" music that we could all hear on the radio. not to mention that it was of low quality because he had poor equipment. he also had a poor selection of music.

the march of dimes is a worthy cause. it's something that i don't mind giving money to. but the idea that my money is going to go and be used for the "enjoyment" of a few people for a few hours blows my mind away. this wouldn't be such an issue if there weren't talent available that could provide the same services. cccnj has a senior banquet every year. instead of hiring a dj for the several 10's of dollars, we just ask some kids with cd players to dj.

there's plenty of talent in the fellowship. this is apparent with tony, one of the most talented brothers. there are others that have been given the gift of skill with electronics and other things of the sort. why pay for these services when you can get them for free right here?

i really grates me that they were raising money for such a frivoulous cause and event. this money could be better spent to feed hungry children. medicate dying children. and many various other causes.

i'm not trying to sound cheap, even thought i am, i am just mearly pointing out the fact that better things could be done. this goes beyond the senior dinner. i think and look at all the money that is wasted for our enjoyment and for our pleasure. i look back on JAW with disgust at the amount of money that was spent just so we could worship. we have plenty of talented musicians right here on campus, but now, we have to spend 5000$ to import a band from texas.

don't get me wrong, i'm very thankful that i got to hear 40 days perform live, but i would rather have seen that money go towards hungry mouths or education or other things that are so desperately needed. this isn't just about JAW either. it's about all the money that's raised for various causes or events that doens't save lives. i'm talking about both physical and spiritual salvation.

with JAW, sure, a few people made decisions, but couldn't we have just walked up to them and presented the gospel? they hadn't even heard 40 days perform yet! so what is the point of wasting all this money on evangelical events?

i also look at things like autumn blaze. it must cost 10's of thousands of dollars to get all those groups to perform. sure they get a lot of decisions, but are they truly saved? i look back to when i made a decision at autumn blaze and realize that i wasn't really saved that night. i wasn't saved until about a year or so after that. that scares me because i could have died thinking that i was going to heaven, when in reality, i was still an object of god's wrath.

i'm tired of constantly reaching in and in at the people that have heard the gosple. i say, they've heard it, now move on to people that haven't. if every christian would just witness to the people they met along the journey which is their life, then we wouldn't have to spend all this money on internal evangelism. we could instead use that money for missions work.

projects are an institution of the church. we need to move away from it. we need to take up our crosses and walk the streets daily. giving up ourselves for His sake. going out into the field and being mocked and ridiculed for what we believe. the message we preach is not a pleasant one. we're too caught up in making the gospel attractive and digestable. we're too busy using feelings and emotions to convey our ideas. we don't need any of that. all we need is prayer and the assistance of god. if god is for us, who coudl be against us?

Forgive us Lord,
-WeY

Posted 8:03 PM by w3y
lesson learned: don't type directly into the blogger, it might die on you when you try to post. my fault, or could it be the computers? regardless of which, i just lost some stuff, not that it was important or remotely interesting, but that's fine.

i talked a bit about my plans for the summer and my apprehension towards the next few weeks. but none of it was interesting. come to think of it, i really don't have much to say or share to the rest of the world. my life is pretty boring and the events in it aren't interesting. maybe i can come up with some better stuff when i'm a little more upset or if something's happened to me.

i should stop spamming my own site and go do something productive with my life.

For His Glory,
WeY

Posted 3:49 PM by w3y
I figured since i would be starting a quick adventure this summer, traveling around the country and what not, i figured i should have some sort of log or account of my exploits. i'm sure that a lot of the stuff that i have won't be that interesting or worthy of posting, but non the less, there are those (few) people that are interested in my life.

i guess this is just the beginning, and since there's not much to digest, i'll just leave it at that.

actually, i got a chance to talk to jsc last night. i haven't talked to him in the longest time, but it was great hearing from him. we went over some history, and just kinda caught up with each other. it's really difficult talking to someone who you care so much about and you know is going to die. the entire time, i had the feeling that i was talking to a cancer patient or and aids victim who refused to get medicaton. they know they have the disease, but they rather just enjoy whatever timie they have left, rather than going out and finding a cure.

it's understandable that he wants to live the way he does. i don't blame him. and i know that there's nothing that i can do to bring him to repentence, but i can't do anything about that either. all i can do is continue to pray and continue to love him. hopefully, i'll have a chance to visit him this summer. i'm praying that my adventures will bring me into proximity with him.

By God's grace,
WeY